12.10.2006

Field Update

I have this overwhelming feeling of doom. Not sure why, at times I feel like I'm one of the women in the Feminine Mystique—valium satiated housewife. However, I'm not on anything, but I do fantasize about having a cocktail once all I have to do is done, but it never is… weird. This is what I asked for, right? To be SAHM (stay at home mom)?? Well, I guess I romanticized the hell out of that notion. I wish, "I could just tear it all down", this feeling I mean (quoting Tim Bluhm, who I'm listening to right now).

Before we left I thought I would be doing more research, but the language barrier is very intimidating for me. I see pregnant women at the church ingesting ayahuasca, and want so bad to ask them questions, but I shrink away once I walk up to them. Instead, I smile and walk on past… Matthew has offered to give informal lessons at home. I think I will take him up on. His research is coming along great. He's very busy. Hey, it just occurred to me that I may be jealous. He's one more step to getting done with his Phd and doing it on something that he is passionate about--Lucky guy. And I'm just being a mom…with the ideas of an anthropologist, but pushing a broom instead of my recorder and pen…

Okay, life can't be all that bad… I think the flies and ants have me down. Since the rains have come we have unexpected houseguests. Winged things, and creepy crawlers are all the rage down here. And just in time for Maddie to start crawling and doing little taste experiments!

Anyohw, Matt had to get some things at the store, so we all went. I hoped this would raise my spirits a bit. It did, somewhat. Maybe I need to go on a run…that always releases some happy endorphins—I wish we were near the ocean… Here are some snaps I took that I thought were interesting scenes. Dig it.

pics

Supergreen vegetation
Muddy roads leading back to our house
the corner store where i buy most our food
Chickens in the Que (notice the guy is bbqing chickens!)